White people and religion:

White people will often say they are “spiritual” but not religious. Which usually means that they will believe any religion that doesn’t involve Jesus.

Popular choices include Buddhism, Hinduism, Kabbalah and, to a lesser extent, Scientology. A few even dip into Islam, but it’s much more rare since you have to give stuff up and actually go to Mosque.

Mostly they are into religion that fits really well into their homes or wardrobe and doesn’t require them to do very much. —(stuffwhitepeoplelike.com)

If the white female votes in the presidential elections of 2008 are cast in accordance with their estrogen laced bodily forms, then Barack Hussein Obama’s almost-blackness and potent sexuality will likely make him the “first almost-black president”.

More powerful than an intelligent party platform and a comprehension of it is the hidden sexual attraction that a white female has towards a suitable black male. While society still tends to frown upon black-white sexual relationships, Obama’s almost-blackness serves as the racial harmonizing bridge that makes the attraction more plausible and less revolting.

Taken together: the taboo on interracial sex, the exotic flavor of ebony skin, appendage size rumors, and Obama’s great flashing white teeth and Mr. Potato Head boyish stick on facial features, it will all be too great a stimulus for white females to not cast their votes for.

The black vote for Obama is certainly in the bag. Blacks don’t care whether the presidential nominee is 50 Cent, Louis Farrakhan, Snoop Dog, or Obama—they’re down with whoever it is as long as they are black, or almost-black which is probably black enough. The logic there is that a black or almost-black president will presumably tend to black ‘needs’ better than a white president.

But white female sexualized voting, and perhaps a sprinkling of white male sexualized voting (one never knows in today’s climate of moral debauchery), is definitely the key to success for Barack Hussein Obama. Toss white guilt into Obama’s magical bag of voter attraction together with his flirtations with Islamic conservatism, and a steamy romp with forbidden pleasures rises to the female’s delicate nose. Though such an encounter will never come to pass except for a lucky few, unless Obama ratchets up his game to Wilt Chamberlain levels, the female mind thrives on futile possibilities—a female’s imagination is her reality.

Can you smell what the Obama campaign is cooking? Obama’s handlers should be touting him as the grown up looking almost-black Opie Taylor from The Andy Griffith Show. Like Opie, Obama is cute and “clean and articulate”, but the deciding difference for white female voters that propels Obama to presidential stardom is that he is sexually mature and endowed with forbidden exoticism. That sort of combination never fails to arouse excitement with the guiltily preoccupied and mentally bereft estrogen incensed crowd.

The American economy is now part of a comedy routine acted out by our President and fumblebutt, George Bush:

“Visualize the Dow at 6,000″ by Mike Whitney

At an improvised press conference last week, George Bush gave what might have been the most comical performance of his eight-year presidency. Looking like the skipper on the flight-deck of the Hindenburg, Bush tried his best to reassure the public that “all’s well” with the economy and that everyone’s deposits were perfectly safe in the rapidly disintegrating US banking system.

Leaning lazily on the presidential podium, Bush shrugged his shoulders and said, “My hope is that people take a deep breath and realize that their deposits are protected by our government. We’re not seeing the growth we’d like to see, but the financial system is basically sound.”

…Fed-chief Bernanke again: “The economy continues to face numerous difficulties, including ongoing strains in financial markets, declining house prices, a softening labor market, and rising prices of oil, food, and some other commodities. . . . The deteriorating performance of subprime mortgages in the United States triggered turbulence in domestic and international financial markets as investors became markedly less willing to bear credit risks of any type. . . . Many financial markets and institutions remain under considerable stress, in part because the outlook for the economy, and thus for credit quality, remains uncertain.”

As Bernanke delivered one hammer-blow after another, our engaging Commander in Chief was busy swapping funny stories and rough-housing with his pals in the Washington press corps. The media confab turned out to be a typical Bush frat-party with plenty of back-slapping and hee-haws to go around.

“You had a question, Stretch?”… (onlinejournal.com)

Our regular news compilation from the homeowner front, or rather, the mortgage meltdown, continues below, courtesy of Patrick Killelea:

Mon Jul 28 2008

The repugnant bailout nation (articles.moneycentral.msn.com)
‘Stealth’ Housing Bailout: It’s Bigger Than You Think (biz.yahoo.com)
Fannie Mae bailout: Taxing America’s poorest to help the richest (blogs.law.harvard.edu)
What Does the Housing Bill Do? (theconglomerate.org)
Bailouts are taxation without representation (eyeonmiami.blogspot.com)
Why Housing Bill Won’t Help Housing Market (seekingalpha.com)
Government should get out of the business of assuming risk (nytimes.com)
Why few decry Fannie-Freddie bailout’s socialism (money.cnn.com)
Official Senator Contact List (senate.gov)
House Votes on Bill To Betray Responsible Savers (govtrack.us)
68% Price Reduction in Los Banos Benefits Responsible Family (patrick.net)
Average S. Florida house dropped $4,100 a month for 2 years straight (cbs4.com)
U.S. regulators seize two more banks (news.yahoo.com)
Why wasn’t IndyMac on FDIC problem list? (sfgate.com)
My experience at IndyMac (appraisersforum.com)
Visualize the Dow at 6,000 (onlinejournal.com)
Why millions just 11 days from financial ruin (dailymail.co.uk)
Higher Interest Rates Last Straw for Foolish Houseowners (fool.com)
Dumpy $625,000 house proves bubble not over yet (ocregister.com)
Pimco’s Gross approves of blowing up 1 million houses (business.smh.com.au)

—(patrick.net)

Peasants! It has truly been a sad past few weeks with no response from the Wicomico County Council to our smattering of corrections to the Transchoptankia Realm, or as commonly referred to: The Bellwether of the Transchoptankia Realm.

Friends, we have merely suggested improvements to the areas of Education, Town Planning, Government, and Crime within the Transchoptankia Realm.

Yet our simple requests have gone unanswered by the Wicomico County Council.

Our letter of recommendations was sent on June 25, 2008 via electronic dissemination to the entire Wicomico County Council. William McCain, Stevie Prettyman, Gail Bartkovich, David MacLeod, and Joe Holloway have declined so far to respond. Even that little worthless twit, Council Administrator Matt Creamer, declined to respond.

However, in a stunning rebuke to the overall tone of the Council, John T. Cannon and Sheree Sample acknowledged via return email that they “Read” the Bellwether list.

We must stress at this stage in our Bellwether Campaign that in the face of agreement or adversity, a leader must be able to stand up and voice where they stand on issues presented to them. Until then, cowardice and incompetence are their only strengths.

Thank you, John T. Cannon and Sheree Sample! You are honorable people for responding to our query, however minimally!

Our next effort will be to pry an intelligent response from the Salisbury Mayor and Wicomico Executive. Wish us luck, readers!

The Bellwether of the Transchoptankia Realm shall ring on!

Peasants! The time has come to cast aside our differences and divert our toothless snarls to pressing matters of the community!

A brief list of necessary laws and public projects has been proposed to raise Salisbury, Wicomico County, and the greater Transchoptankia Realm from their corruption and misery.

Within each department of Education, Town Planning, Government, and Crime outlined below are at least two precepts to consider. In truth, any one precept in any department that is enacted would be a touching of the brakes to the Transchoptankia Realm’s downward spiral. It would also be astounding, given the abject corruption of the politicians and the sheer ignorance of the citizens.

Thus, the “Bellwether of the Transchoptankia Realm” has been proclaimed!

1. Education:

—Dress uniform at all schools.

—Include unambiguous values throughout educational system: marital fidelity, honesty, kindness, bravery, thriftiness, cleanliness, etc.

2. Town Planning:

—A small to medium sized grocery store near downtown Salisbury plaza that does not sell lotto tickets, cigarettes, or degenerate magazines; instead showcasing a substantial selection of local goods and produce that is sold by a friendly local person.

—Convert at least half of the downtown parking lot to a native plant gardened public central green with benches, shaded walkways, and art pieces.

3. Government:

—Begin easily accessed, easily understandable, and transparent detailed accounting of government expenditures and methodology. Create a budget analyzing office charged with justifying and lessening government costs for the purpose of efficiency, long term value, and preserving the local economy — an office which is shielded from the contrary and empowered to oversee government financial matters.

—Require health and ethical standards for all political leaders, including no prior divorce, no womanizing or whoring, no homosexuality, no alcoholism or drug addictions, and no obesity, among other reasonable standards.

—Move city and county council rooms to a more prominent and visible location in downtown Salisbury that has large windows on ground level whereby any passerby may easily look in and see participatory democracy and intelligent public debate.

4. Crime:

—Fine parents of children committing crimes.

—Gang injunctions. Youth curfews.

—Inmate work camps growing crops and manufacturing products. Vocational training for inmates.

—Ban repeat offenders or notorious criminals from city or county limits.