"The quality of a town's citizenry can be precisely determined by a general sampling of the state of their bathrooms, both public and private, in regard to the degree of doodles, spray paint, gougings, moldy patches, soap scum, paper trash, misdirected leavings, broken tile, flaked paint, gum spots, cracked mirrors, flickering lighting, moist flooring, debilitating odors, and loitering customers."

—Outraged Richard