George Walker Bush of Texas has announced plans to sprinkle a few National Guard representatives along the Mexican border. Mr. Bush will follow up his announcement by visiting Yuma, Arizona later in the week to further bolster his border security plans.

"We've got a big plan here. Big plan. We have enlisted the help of Nike, Evian, and John Deere to be at official Reststop Checkpoints along the border to hand out athletic shoes, bottled water, and weed-whackers," White House Spokesman Tony Snow translated from Mr. Bush's increasingly hard to understand Mexamerican twang.

"America's taxpayers are putting together a little welcome basket for our friendly Mexican neighbors coming over to visit these United States. Brand name athletic gear, some refreshment, and a tool for successful employment are the least we can do."

Asked if National Guard representatives will be checking identity cards of the friendly Mexican travelers, Snow stated that would not be necessary. "We don't want to pass judgment. These people have the right to educate, reproduce, and employ themselves like everyone else and we need to recognize that over a plastic card. If the State of Mexico can't provide enough re-fried beans for their people to subsist on, then send them over!"

Happy Mother's Day California! Decent and respectable mothers are holding their noses as cesspool California bubbles up its latest stench:

…the California State Senate passed SB 1437, which tramples local control of schools and infringes on parental rights as it mandates transsexual, bisexual, and homosexual indoctrination of students as young as kindergarten…. (saveamerica)

To further the sexual indoctrination of young kids after their public school reaming, Governor Schwarzenegger has created a Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, and Transgender (GLBT) enforcement team to search private homes to confiscate any communication material that casts GLBT people in a negative light.

"[What will be confiscated] could be as simple as not mentioning famous GLBT people, like Abraham Lincoln, who was gay" a GLBT Code Enforcement Officer said.

Parents have begun the heartbreaking task of throwing away most literature in their houses, including their prince and princess fairy tale stories, and are trudging down to the vast Gay, Lesbian, and Transgender section at their local Barnes and Noble booksellers to pick up corrected literature like the fairy tale King and King or the great adventure story Jack and Jim.

Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, and Rapunzel of the classical fairy tale stories have completed filing unemployment claims with the California Employment Development Department after filing similar claims with the Massachusetts Department of Workforce Development.

On illegal immigration Frosty Wooldridge says,

The United States faces the greatest internal threat to its existence since the Civil War. It faces disintegration of its culture; of its language; of its cohesiveness as a nation of free people. It faces massive infusion of unrelenting poverty; of crime; of diseases; of civil violence; of corruption at all levels…

Myth: President Bush says illegals do the jobs Americans won’t do.

Fact: Harvard Professor Borjas reports that illegal aliens displace Middle American workers out of $200 billion annually in lost jobs and wages. Bear-Sterns report shows that illegal aliens work off the books and do not pay over $301 billion annually in uncollected IRS income taxes…

Myth: This is a nation of immigrants and they all add to America’s vitality.

Fact: That was then and this is now. Ninety percent of Americans were born here and thus, natives, not immigrants…Who in their right mind thinks we need to import 4,000,000 million people from the Third World into our country annually?

Myth: [President] Bush respects the sovereignty of the United States.

Fact: George Bush works to destroy our borders of our nation on a deadly experiment that will plummet all of us into chaos, poverty and Third World Momentum. He promotes NAFTA, FTAA, CAFTA, Council of Foreign Relations and the Tri-Lateral Commission…

Myth: You can’t deport 12 to 20 million illegal aliens.

Fact: You won’t have to…You demand the president and Congress enforce our immigration laws…We prosecute and jail employers of illegal aliens starting in Maine and sweeping slowly and effectively across the nation. We delete social services to illegals, housing, medical and welfare of any kind…. (newswithviews)

The Los Angeles Police Department is being sued in connection with its policy prohibiting officers from inquiring about an individual's immigration status, and reportedly restricting them from cooperating with federal immigration officials.

The action has been filed by the public-interest group Judicial Watch, and asks the court to prohibit the LAPD from expending taxpayer funds to enforce and maintain "Special Order 40," claiming it violates both California and federal laws and puts American citizens at risk.

"Special Order 40 is illegal and dangerous," said the group's president, Tom Fitton. "It constrains police officers from enforcing the law and places everyone at risk from criminal illegal aliens…." (WorldNetDaily)